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7.25.2012

EXHAUSTED.

Well, here goes another summer that flew by, before we could enjoy it or even realize it was around.  Last year, we missed out on our summer for the anticipation of Cole's upcoming surgery.  ...this year, it's the anticipation of getting his 24 hour EEG done!  ...to tell you the truth, we are EXHAUSTED!  Mentally & Physically...it doesn't matter if we got a good night sleep anymore, oh, and how every muscle in my body HURTS.  Cole is getting bigger and beats us up in his "fits of rage".  The problem is, we think it's bad now...it's only going to get worse as he keeps growing.  I try not to think of the future and live life day by day...because having a Special Needs child only gets harder.  Right now, everyone thinks Cole is cute and his mannerisms are cute, different & child like...as he gets older his peers might be afraid of him or even worse treat him badly.  ...one of my friend's, friend's has a child with special needs and she said "being a parent of a special needs child often feels like your world is closing in on  you, when everyone elses seems to be opening up".  I have to say that she described something to the "T" of how I've felt many times before.  That's not to say I feel like that right this second, but geez, it would be nice to not be so fearful of everything in and around your child's life.  ...it's hard, and that's what scares me the most...it's GOING to get harder.  I used to wonder how the "mom's of special needs" children do it...it looked hard and I did NOT  envy it.  Now that I'm her...I know they do it because of the Love of their child...the child is  "the quarter back" & we are "the Left guard, Right guard & Defense"....we want to them "score" as we try to protect them every step of the way.   Anyways, let me get "out of reality" and share some pics of this cute little guy!

he's always got his fingers in his mouth.
mommy & daddy.
daddy saw mommy needed a "pick me up/comfort food".
don't worry, this is a "clean water drain".
anyone in there?
...and daddy & cole.

2 comments:

  1. You have and always will be such an inspiration in my life. Little cole was sent to you because god knew you could handle it, even with all the hardships along the way. If I ever become half the mom you are, I will be so grateful! Love you, A, and Cole to pieces!!

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  2. fear can be debilitating for sure...check out max lucado's sermon series called 'fearless'. I found it on youtube and it was so comforing. We seem to be in a calm spot of our storm, but I'm praying that you will find reprieve soon as well.

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